Raising Respectful Kids: How to Teach the Moral Focus Virtue at Every Age

At National Heritage Academies (NHA^®), we believe that building strong character is just as important as academic success. That’s why each month we focus on one of our Moral Focus virtues. This month’s virtue is Respect, a quality that helps children grow into thoughtful, kind, and responsible adults.

Respect is more than saying “please” and “thank you.” It’s about treating others the way you want to be treated, listening with an open mind, and showing value for the differences that make each of us unique. As NHA Moral Focus Specialist Colby Tein explains:

“Respect can look like and sound like a variety of things, as simple as using good manners like not interrupting to keeping an open posture and positive tone of voice in regard to others.”

Respect for Young Children

For younger kids, respect starts with the basics:

• Good manners: Encourage saying “please” and “thank you.”
• Listening: Teach them not to interrupt and to take turns when speaking.
• Caring for belongings: Show them how putting toys away or treating books gently is a form of respect.

Respect for Elementary-Age Children

As children grow, their understanding of respect should expand:

• Positive tone: Encourage them to use kind words with siblings, friends, and teachers.
• Open posture: Help them see that body language, like eye contact and standing tall, shows respect, too.
• Valuing differences: Read stories or explore cultures that are different from your own to highlight how diversity enriches our lives.

Respect for Teens

For older children and teens, respect often shows up in more complex ways:

• Handling conflicts: Encourage respectful conversations, even when they disagree.
• Digital respect: Talk about kindness online and how words can impact others on social media.
• Self-respect: Guide them in setting boundaries and treating themselves with the same care they show others.

Modeling Respect at Home

The most powerful way to teach respect is to model it yourself. Speak kindly, listen with patience, and show value for others even when you disagree. Your children are always watching, and the way you treat others will shape how they treat people, too.

Tein says parents play an important role in helping their children understand how to be respectful:

“To encourage your children to be respectful, live out the virtue yourself by treating others the way you want to be treated, finding value in differences, and approaching conflicts with an open mind.”

When we teach respect at every age, we prepare our children to succeed not just in school, but in life. Respect builds stronger friendships, healthier communities, and a brighter future for all.